Brand identity is what marketing people give you when they can't give you sales

So that's why I've always spent a lot of time "branding".  I've talked positioning, I've tweaked logos, I've reconfigured web sites, I've devised suites of collateral as multifarious as the seas.  It's a lot of work, but at least when you're done you don't have anyone asking you why sales are down.

For some reason, no one thinks rebranding has anything to do with sales.

Really, of course, it should.  But it's so indirect, it's impossible to tie together.  Unlike, say, the response rate on that last mailing or the stats on the sales pages on the web site.  Nowhere to hide there.  Marketing people will chew their own arms off to get out of that particular trap.

A few months ago my company was forced to change its name and all of its branding.  The orders came from above, and were not to be argued with.  We got an absurd logo and an eye-hurting color palette.  Our press releases had so much boastful boilerplate there was no room for content.  I had to describe the offerings of our parent organization before I could kiss my wife when I got home.

Then everyone responsible disappeared.

Now what?  The new administration indicates we can escape from our current identity.  For various reasons, going back to our original identity is not in the cards.  So I'm riding the rebranding train once again.  Wish me luck.

As an author, I have it pretty easy.  I have my name, such as it is.  I have my positioning--"amusing, snarky writer of SF with pretensions of literary quality"--and my message--"buy my book!"--all pretty straightforward.

It's my day job that does the brain damage.